In general, people crown parents as a king / queen of the castle. We are not comfortable to discuss / talk behind our parents because the logic of “there’s no bad parent” is already tattooed in our mind / spirit.
How dare we judge our parents? They have already sacrificed so much for us? So many excuses to support their destructive / abusive behaviors, such as “they don’t mean to hurt you, or it’s just because they didn’t have a nice / caring parents so they never learned how to parent their own kids …. so and so….
I was trapped in these kinds of stereotypes for many years, guilt and shame filled me up because I was not suppose to hate or judge my parents. What’s wrong with me? No one is perfect in the world right?
I am an evil and not a good person, etc. I was the one who need to be blamed because of my ungrateful / UN-forgiveness.
However, the more knowledge I gained, the more I understand abusive / toxic parents are related to serious personality disorder so impossible to fix. Some people really not qualified as parents since they project their anger / frustration on their own kids.
They don’t know we all human have CHOICE, to treat or not treat others in certain ways.
Are you lucky enough to have good parents? Or not?