It’s kind of difficult to deal with this type of attitudes.
We never easy to catch if that person is really understand or willing to follow through the commitment or not.
You have experience to deal with this kind of situation? Or this is actually your way of handling stress / conflict?
Effects of Childhood Trauma is unpredictable and can destroy individual over lifespan.
Many adult survivor still controlled by their inner child no matter what age they reach. They may react to situation like a child even though they physically matured enough to handle the situation.
Personally, this is one of the weakness I’m still working on it. Sometimes I just lead by my inner child emotion and forget I’m an adult and capable to own my life now.
How about You? Do you have an inner child within?
The Scapegoat – the one who refuse to stay silent in unbearable atmosphere created in family.
Scapegoats hold on to destructive relationship by forgetting the abuse and focusing on the fantasy.
The older I get the more I understand this theory, people who hurt others are actually the most unhappiest person.
Something happened in their lives that they can’t or not willing to deal with, instead, they project their problems / frustration / anger on others.
But it doesn’t mean their behaviors are acceptable. I believe we all are human so have the power to chose what we suppose to do.
How do you think about this?
Please comment or share this to someone you think they are going through difficult relationship right now.
This cognitive bias can be found in many situation, e.g. when we believe something at the first place, we will look for signs / evidence to prove our beliefs, even though it’s non-sense / urological.
That’s why it’s so important to evaluate our thoughts always because it may mislead our upcoming behaviors.
How about you? Do you have this kind of bias that distort your perspectives often?
I used to cried a lot, so confused, frustrated and lived in foggy days.
The more self-education I gained, the more strength and clarity I got about my situation.
Today, I no longer spent as much as time like before: feeling depressed or sorry for myself, though still feel frustrated from time to time but it’s more controllable.
How about you? How you deal with your past?
Scapegoated children and adults may suffer from chronic insecurity in relationships.
Society / public make excuses for abusers, such as : Oh he’s just stress out, Oh, he / she didn’t had a good childhood thus they are now abuse another generation.
Stop it! Shut Up! We all human have the power to make choice : to abuse or not to abuse.
All these crapping excuses are not helping but sugar coating the abuse. Or protecting abusers to escape from their behaviors.
What do you think?
Abusers may act different in public and behind doors. This is the tactic they use to charm and lie to others.
Victims may have difficulties to explain their situations as it’s hard to find outsiders acknowledge the truth behind scenes.
At the same time, victims may also pretend as a happy person, living in a dream life but in fact they are suffering from abuse.
Are you good at spoting these lies? Are you living 2 different lives?