This is very different from the “closed family”.
Closed Handed family is all members in the family is kind of tied together in a unhealthy way. They can’t grow emotionally and individuality is disappear in this type of family.
I cherish closed and supported family, but not the one that over-cling together. The more you love your child, the more you need to let them grow and have their own lives.
What do you think?
A healthy family is one that cherish individuality. You gained support while manage to develop your own self identity.
In unhealthy / dysfunctional family, the boundaries are violated and everyone is so enmeshed together emotionally.
This structure will destroy child development, his / her individuality which end up ruin his / her relationship with others when they step into adulthood or have their own families.
How’s your family system and how it affect you?
In abusive family, no one for a child to tell and hide.
They kept the pain to themselves while a part of them died.
In healthy families, we encourage our children to be loving and close to each other.
In narcissistic families, children are pitted against each other & taught competition.
Feel out of touch with your real self. Many children of toxic parents find it exceptionally difficult to identify who they are once they grow up.
Unhealthy view of relationships – if a parent who exploded, constantly overcritical, vanished or demanded perfection, we don’t have a healthy view of real, caring relationships.
Parent asking the child to be their parent, and to fix and support them.
You noticed any child acting like this?
Even in workplace, I worked with people who always laugh for silly jokes or minor / non-sense things.
At surface, they seem happy for live and optimistic for everything, but I just knew they are masking their insecure / shame and guilty by fake happiness.
That’s why we heard stories from time to time, mentioning this or that person seems happy all times but how come they commit suicide or doing horrible things to others suddenly.
What do you think? You met someone like this?
The Scapegoat – the one who refuse to stay silent in unbearable atmosphere created in family.
Parents placing unrealistic expectations on child’s role in their life.