A narcissist will put the child down to make them feel inferior and worthless so that they struggle to maintain level of confidence needed to exist independently.
Shutting out a child with the silent treatment is very damaging and immature.
People know who they can walk over and who they can’t.
If someone is walking all over you, it’s because they know you’ll put up with it.
I was very confused why Narcissists can always escape from their abusive behavior while everyone adore him / her without notice their true personality.
Spent lots of time to research and understand the truth behind, finally a new term “narcissist supply”came up to me. Wow. Now I knew there’s a logic of demand and supply.
If there’s a narcissist, it must have someone to supply this to fill his / her ego. Otherwise, narcissist can’t exist without support.
My younger sister is typically the supplier for my abusive / narcissistic father. The more she supports him the more he feel comfortable to do whatever he wants, while keeping a nice guy image to the public.
What I found people who is willing to devote to narcissistic supply, usually is related to co-dependent characteristic. Narcissists bribe them with fake attention / love, they spot the supplier lack of confidence and self-esteem so take the advantage of them.
I used to jealous my sister’s privilege but not now. She’s very depressed, no friends and no jobs due to all the toxic relationship she built up with narcissist. She became resentful and dependent, cling to relationships.
It’s sad to watch and remind myself better work harder on my own self-improvement because I don’t want to follow her path.
This seems a very difficult term, it came to my realization years ago when I read a nice book about “Dr. Jekyll & Mr Hyde” symptoms.
It opens my eyes and motivate me to learn more about this topic, which happens commonly among abusers / narcissists.
Many occasions, people shocked me when I found they act totally differently in public and behind doors. This make me feel more uncomfortable to deal with so-called charming person because I witness many lies behind.
How about you? have you ever meet this type of people?
This is a very common attribution, happens not only in abusive stories but all kinds of incidents at work / in public.
People tend to blame the victims and that’s why make it difficult for survivors to speak up or stand up for themselves. Lack of supports and misunderstandings make victims take all responsibilities of abuse on their own hands.
The worst, after the abuse, survivors are those who need to forgive and forget even though it’s impossible in many of cases. Once again we put extra burden on their shoulders and give permissions for abusers to escape from their faults, saying something like, well…he / she didn’t mean to do this. That’s terrible.
Have you ever behave in similar way? Please comment and share this post so more people aware what’s our unconscious behavior lead us to.
The more I educated myself, the more I realized I actually attract many narcissists into my life. Guess it’s because I used to have a very low self-esteem and no ideas about healthy boundaries.
Hope many people will understand this personality disorder as early as possible. It took me years to figure things out and start my healing journey.
How about you? Have you ever meet someone consist of this character? How do you deal with them?