Pressure on you to make narcissistic family look good to outsiders. Rejection or abandonment if you do not.
Ongoing scapegoating, criticism, attacks, blaming, shaming or shunning are used as a threat or weapon by the narcissist and their allies, if they don’t get their way.
Child of a narcissist exists solely to be of benefit to their parent.
Narcissist see their children as an extension of themselves.
You are expected to act like a parent to your parent(s). Rather than having your parent(s) care for you. You lose love, approval and privileges.
Family members may align with the narcissist. These narcissist supporters can be the other parent, sibling or extended family.
Even if you’re empathic towards family, you are accused of being uncaring for not putting others, especially the narcissist first.
You have been taught to believe that you are the crazy and imbalanced one, instead of them.
You are not allowed to be yourself. Not allowed to have your own needs, personality and independence.
They have the golden child and the scapegoat child.
One child was seen as perfect and capable of doing no harm.
The other child was seen as the black sheep, and the cause of all issues.
Many of child abuse survivors still love their parents, and have been fed a constant narrative that they were the problem.